Monday, December 24, 2012

10 Rules / Tips for Christmas

Here are a few rules / tips for Christmas
1) You are going to gain a few pounds deal with it! That's why we have new years resolutions.
2) Don't dress up your pets! They may look cute, but trust me they will resent you for the rest of the year.
3) No matter what gifts you get, look surprised and happy (Botox helps with this)! You can always recycle that gift again next year.

4) Every family has a pink elephant, the aunt that got really fat, the bastard child or the odd face-lift! Christmas dinner is neither the best time nor the best place to introduce this into conversation no matter how dull the conversation is.
5) If you plan on "Coming Out", don't do it in a Santa's costume. This will NOT soften the blow and it will ruin Santa's wholesome image.
6) No party tricks! It may seem a good idea in your head but in reality you will make an ass of yourself.
7) Always wear underwear! This is essential and not just for Christmas.8) Be nice! We may not like all of our family, but the nice thing about Christmas is that you only have to see them once a year.
9) Don't drink and drive! I treasure all my blog readers and I don't want to loose the few of you!
10) The most important rule of them all - BE FABULOUS!!!
(Wishing Everyone a Blessed Christmas.)

7 comments:

lifeshighway said...

All very sage advice and words to live by... but I will probably still dress up my cat.

TJ Lubrano said...

Hahaha! Awesome post!! Happy Holidays to you as well!! Be fabulous, enjoy the food and drinks and wish you an awesome time!! Take care

Vania Moreira said...

I agree with all the rules!
Merry Christmas!

Unknown said...

Very funny!!! Merry Xmas!!

Soph said...

Hey it's Soph :)
I tagged your blog! You can check it out at my blog and tag others. www.thoughtsstoriespoems.blogspot.com Well done for all your great work.

Bitter Bitches said...

Thanks for all the fabulous comments! I wish everyone a very merry Christmas. Let's keep on spreading the joy, especially to those less fortunate than us.

Mind Of Mine said...

Excellent post.

Merry Christmas.

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